BORN ON A MONDAY
EPISODE IX

IF IT’S GOING TO BE, THEN IT’S UP TO ME!

I once watched a TV interview of a man (Let’s call him Bill) who told a true story about a young boy and his family.

Bill was part of a community where sports & games were played at a community centre & there happened to be a particular young boy (an adolescent or younger) who was constantly displaying antisocial behaviour. He was always getting into fights, using foul language & refusing to take correction.

Bill said in the interview that he kept saying,

“Someone ought to do something about that boy!”

But he did nothing.

Over & over again, whenever the boy did something wrong, Bill would comment, “Someone should do something about that boy”!

BUT HE DID NOTHING.

A few years later, this boy joined a gang & was sent to assassinate someone in the neighbourhood. However, he was given the wrong address. The address he went to was the home of Bill’s mother. This boy (now a young man) ended up murdering Bill’s Mom & Sister.

What happened after has never left me. After grieving & dealing with the effects of this tragedy, Bill started a volunteer group to young people in his neighbourhood & elsewhere focused on helping deal with delinquent behaviour.

The impact of this particular volunteer group was the reason why he was being interviewed.

He said he understood that if something was done about that boy, his mother & sister would probably not have been murdered. Bill promised himself that he would do all in his power to prevent anyone else from experiencing the pain his family went through.

A wise person once said that we should all have a sense of responsibility that says, “If it’s going to be, then it’s up to me”.

The changes in our business, lives & careers are dependent on our personal responsibility & attitude towards necessary action. There are a plethora of excuses that we may have for not taking necessary action whenever we work.

These actions sometimes may not even be our direct or immediate responsibility. But indeed there are times when our inaction can end up being the reason for our own pain & confusion in the future.

We need to constantly have the attitude, “If it’s going to be, then it’s up to me”!
Your sense of personal responsibility is often your protection from future regrets. If you have this attitude, you will always be satisfied that you at least did your best.

The ‘Can do’ person doesn’t just change their life, they often positively affect the lives of others.

There are practical things you can do to develop a ‘Can do’ attitude.

1. Before you say something can’t be done, ask HOW it can be done. Think about the possibility before you get bogged down with the negatives. Dream it, don’t excuse it. This isn’t easy, but is always possible.

2. Be HONEST with yourself & others. Understand & accept your roles, responsibilities, strengths & weaknesses & learn how to leverage them for effectiveness in every situation.

3. PRACTICE ACCOUNTABILITY for your roles & actions. Never avoid being accountable to others. It builds far more than it appears to reduce you.

4. BE COMPASSIONATE to others & yourself. Your compassion can be the key to change. Don’t lock it out, use it as best you can.

5. PRACTICE SELF AWARENESS & SELF REFLECTION. Journal your daily activities, have times of meditation & reflection, have periodic retreats etc These practices help you take note of truths about your life long before life does.

6. HAVE A BIAS FOR ACTION. It is said that if you want something done, give it to a busy person. People that are quick to take action often get things done far more than those that have a lot of time on their hands. This proves that getting things done isn’t as much about time as it is about attitude & a sense of responsibility.

7. And finally BE COURAGEOUS & believe that you have what it takes to anticipate, act, respond & make changes.

Remember, “If it’s going to be, then it’s up to me”!

Have a great week & see you next Monday!

Dr Ben Wayo
DrBenWayo@aol.com

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